Does anyone actually watch the Winter Olympics?

Two weeks ago, on February 12, the opening ceremony was held for the XXI Olympic Winter Games… or more informally, the 2010 Winter Olympics. Hosted in Vancouver this time around, these Winter Olympics will feature the following 15 sports: alpine skiing, biathlon, bobsleigh, cross-country skiing, curling, figure skating, freestyle skiing, ice hockey, luge, nordic combined, short track speed skating, skeleton, ski jumping, snowboarding, and speed skating.

Here’s my question: who cares?!

Not me. That’s for sure.

To be honest, the only event that I watched from this Winter Olympics was the men’s halfpipe competition. (That’s a snowboarding event, by the way.) And the only reason I watched that was because of Shaun White, who’s a certified G. Don’t question it.

But really, other than snowboarding, and maybe ice hockey, what is there exciting to watch in the Winter Olympics? I’ll give you a few seconds….. thought of something? You did? …you said FIGURE SKATING?! Why am I going to watch somebody dance around on ice, doing jumps and spins and all that good stuff? That’s not a sport, that’s a musical performance. And musical performances aren’t very Olympic, in my opinion. So… that’s a no.

Wait… you thought of something else? What’d you think of? …you said CURLING??? You should be glad I can’t smack you through the computer. According to the official Olympics page about the “sport” of curling:

At the Olympic Winter Games, curling consists of two events: a women’s tournament and a men’s tournament. Each tournament starts with 10 curling teams. Two teams play against each other at a time. The game is played on ice, and the two teams take turns pushing 19.1-kilogram stones towards a series of concentric rings or circles. The object is to get the stones as close to the centre of the rings as possible.

One game consists of 10 “ends” (similar to innings in baseball). During each end, each four-person team “throws” (in fact, slides along the ice) eight stones — two stones per person and 16 altogether. Team members sweep the ice clean in front of each stone to control the stone’s direction, known as its “curl,” and the stone’s speed. The team with the most points — more stones closer to the centre of the rings — at the conclusion of 10 ends, is the winner.

Umm… so yeah. That’s also a no.

Honestly, the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing were exponentially better than this. Remember the unbelievable opening ceremony? The success of the “Redeem Team” of U.S. men’s basketball? The presence of actual sports, such as football (soccer), tennis, and baseball? Now that’s what I call the Olympics. This winter crap… definitely not.

Fortunately, there are only two more days of the Winter Olympics, as the closing ceremony is on Sunday. Finally, it’s coming to an end. Praise the name of the Lord, for He is worthy to be praised!


About D. Hudson

A gentleman and a scholar.
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